Do you ever find that the biggest decisions you make for yourself are the ones that you make the most quickly? I can think of a few big decisions I almost made on the fly. The biggest one was buying my house. The market was insane, and houses were selling within hours of going on the market. Buyers, including me, were writing love letters to homeowners begging them to pick them to spend an outsized amount of money to buy homes that were much less valuable than their asking prices.
Thankfully, my offers weren’t accepted, and I was able to slow down and think about what outcome I really wanted and how I wanted to get there. Did I really want to move? Did I really want to move when the market was so hot? Why did I want to move? What was I hoping I would get out of the move?
I learned that thinking slowly was the best way to make a good decision with the outcome I wanted and that going on a journey toward that decision was better than ended up with an outcome without going on that journey. The same can be said of divorce. You may think you want a divorce or even know that you want one, but it is important to slow down and realize that divorce is a journey and that it does not happen overnight. There are many questions that need to be answered. Do I really want a divorce? Do I really want a divorce now? Why do I want to divorce? What am I hoping to get out of the divorce? Am I being realistic about how the divorce will play out? How do I want to divorce? What are the options to divorce? Have I considered these same questions but from the perspective of my spouse and my children? Divorce is a big decision that cannot be made quickly. It requires a lot of thinking and planning and a divorce attorney or mediator can help you with that. Divorce attorneys and mediators know what questions to ask so that you can answer the questions that you have asked yourself. For example, a divorce attorney/mediator will ask you: How do you want to divorce? When do you want to divorce? And the many other questions listed above.
The attorney/mediator will explain the options regarding divorce and help you begin the journey that you have likely been thinking about beginning for a very long time. Most importantly, Marlene will begin with the end in mind – the end being the outcome you want from the divorce. While the divorce itself is one outcome, it is a very small part of the journey. In fact, you cannot get to the divorce until you know how you want your family to look when the divorce is final. Marlene will help you determine the resolution that you want and with Marlene, you will achieve that resolution, finally.